Haven’t we all wondered why relationships are so complicated?not just romantic, but any relationship for that matter.
I mean its weird..they start so simply..u like someone or u don’t like someone or ur just somewhere in between.and then as days,months and years progress, the dynamics just change.
Sometimes the sensation, the ‘gut-feeling ‘ is just so right...yet things go ahead and take on a different color altogether!
What changes? why does it change? why are some people always ‘so lucky’ with relationships..why do some people constantly struggle?
Perhaps, the most defining aspect of any relationship is the fact that it involves individuals-two, three etc; who come with their own individuality, thought process, preferences, experiences, emotions etc and then begins a tussle-whether to let go of how one has been for majority part of one’s lives or to hold onto our sense of being for our dear lives!
What is the ideal way of sustaining one selves and our relationships?
rather,is there an ideal way?
Perhaps not.because being with anyone, in whatever capacity involves a sense of self discovery.and discovery and our sense of self , both are continuous processes...things that never really end. but we are for most part of our lives, are not aware of this fact.and so the questions and the struggle never ends.
Why do we fear commitment...at times because it involves compromising and letting go of some part of ourselves or sometimes, we are afraid of being made aware of the inner aspects of ourselves.
Why do we long for someone to fill the void in our lives..so that we can be made to feel different..complete..so that we get to know ourselves better.
Sometimes we decide to shut ourselves from the ones we love the most, because we don’t want to be the ones to hurt them..and yet, at times we find ourselves in the middle of arguments and quarrels that could be easily avoided :p
But in relationships, what starts in one way, doesn’t have to follow a predetermined path.
For along the way we encounter numerous situations,thoughts,emotions..that change our perceptions, our beliefs..and at times lead us to react in ways that were not familiar to us before.
Just like us, our relationships are dynamic.they cannot and should not be the same.of course, the essence of our relationships should be the same...the foundation-strong.yet, we should be adaptable and open minded enough to give room to ourselves and the others to explore, evaluate,choose,react and decide how we want to grow together.
Every relation-good or bad is meant to teach us something.only, if we are perceptive to our own inner selves.
Fights with our parents or loved ones teach us how right or wrong we are, or how valued we are with respect to each other.
Friendships and love relationships are integral to our self esteem,our growth, our need to feel special at any time of the day!
The bad of a relationship is as important as the good!
Yes, relationships are complicated..and more so because many-a-times we don’t know whats going on within ourselves. Isnt it common that we get into a relationship just like that..and then realise what we got ourselves into?or we just decide to behave ‘weirdly’ because we are angry,frustrated,depressed,excited?
Yes, we do..we all do.yet, its our associations, interactions with other people that lead us to discover something or the other about ourselves.and it is this self discovery that finds its place in some other relationship!
And it goes on...:)