They're soothing.They're calming.They have the quality of being able to cleanse the mind,body and soul.They demand to be unrestricted.Yet, they aren't welcome everywhere.
Why is crying so difficult? Why does it come with so many attachments? Like, you can't cry in a public place,you can't cry when you're with people,in front of someone who's not your family or friend and many times you can't even cry with/in front of your family or friends.And the gender stereotypes that come with it, that is a separate theory altogether.
When you feel happy and you laugh out loud,it's fine.When you're irritated and you just snap at someone (irrespective of the place),it's fine.You can get angry and get into a fight no matter where you are.You just can't cry anywhere and everywhere because you're upset or sad or depressed.
Even I find it uncomfortable to cry in open. I wonder why is that...? Have we been taught that?
At an unconscious level,may be.
Perhaps, there is an existential quality attached to the act of crying and to those salty tears.A quality that once acknowledged and experienced, exposes our soul to the world,in its complete vulnerability and innocence.A state that we would always like to keep close to our hearts.
It almost takes us back to an infant like stage.He/she comes into an unknown world and all he/she can do is cry.
But is crying simply an act of weakness? It's difficult-yes. But just because you cry, it doesn't mean you're weak. In fact,when an infant cries,he/she expresses his needs. That's the language that he knows.
Crying can mean so many things except weakness.In fact, it can be someone's moment of weakness.It's just a moment and we all are entitled to one.
Crying means acknowledgment and acceptance of what's going on within and outside. It means that even though, you may be unable to do anything to change things, you at least know that something is going on.A something that is important enough to warrant our attention.
It means that the mind needs a break.It's exhausted and has no space to accommodate so much-positive or negative.It needs to be vacuumed.
Have you ever noticed the kind of rambling that one engages in when crying? That's the subconscious talking.
Crying doesn't signify the end.It marks the beginning.Life goes on in a circle and you can do nothing else but move on.When something ends, something new also begins.But we always find it compelling to focus on what's ended,rather than what new can emerge out of it.
We get hurt, we cry
When someone dies, we cry.
When we lose relationships, we cry.
Even when we're overjoyed, we cry.
We're nervous or afraid, we cry.
Sometimes we even cry out of confusion.
But all these don't make us weak.They just point towards some newer realization. Because once the mind has been vacuumed thoroughly and the tears have dried, a light,soothing, almost empty feeling sets in.
A feeling, that sooner or later,makes us want to get up and go on.
It is at this stage, that we feel most vulnerable to situations and people.But we like to believe we are weak.So the best way to shield ourselves from this is to not cry in front of anyone at all.
May be, if we look at the whole act of crying a little differently and simply acknowledge it as any other emotion that we have justified in our lives, we won't feel weak.
As long as you are aware of what your state is, crying,anger,irritation,happiness and all other emotions will be experienced in their purest form-devoid of any other 'convenient' justifications.
Our own vulnerability is scary,because that's what we have made ourselves believe.
It is a state.
States are transient and so are emotions.
Having emotions doesn't make one weak. Lack of awareness does.
I guess, the easiest thing one can do ,is just to accept the way we feel.
After all,emotions are the essence of existence.The label of 'positive' and 'negative' is more than enough to help us rationalize.
The more labels there are, the more confused we will be.
Emotions don't need labels.They just need to be felt and experienced.
Beautifully Penned and amazing clicks !ReplyDelete
Thank you so much for appreciating :)Delete
Crying is never an easy emotion. Like you rightly said, it would be a lot easier if we take it as just another form of emotion that can be expressed....ReplyDelete
Thank you so much for sharing my thoughts on this :)really appreciate it!ReplyDelete
Having emotions doesn't make one weak. Lack of awareness does.ReplyDelete
Well said, Damini. People also don't show their tears because not only does the vast majority not care, but also often draws glee from pouring salt on wounds...
Thank u Vishal Kataria!:)ReplyDelete
Feels great when one's words are not just expressed, but understood and shared as well :)